Monthly Archive: June, 2011

Obama Admits Affair Governing East Timor

WASHINGTON D.C. In an apparent mid-life crisis, President Barack Obama has admitted he governed the hot, young nation of East Timor.  Apparently, his recent overseas trips were cover-stories for trips to East Timor… Continue reading

SWP Summer Reading List

TEMPE, AZ. The staff at Small Winged Potatoes have been busy slogging through some horrible titles to find the best summer reads for you.  Here are some “couldn’t put it down” suggestions. NONFICTION… Continue reading

Bachmann Turns To Overdrive: “We Don’t Want The Funk.”

AMES, IA. Newly announced presidential candidate Michele Bachmann isn’t wasting any time going after her anticipated Democratic opponent in the 2012 election. Today in Iowa she called for “a thorough investigation” of the Smithsonian’s… Continue reading

Nuggets of Wisdom from Graduations Around the U.S.

It’s that time of year again to inspire graduates around the country with nuggets of wisdom from some of the country’s greatest thinkers and speakers. Snoop Dogg spoke to graduates at “Buzz” Aldrin… Continue reading

House Votes to Stop President, Permanently

WASHINGTON D.C. Today the House of Representatives voted to stop the President. In a bold repudiation of Executive powers, the House voted overwhelmingly for a resolution that would force the president to stop… Continue reading

Security Tapes Reveal No One Really Working

PHOENIX, AZ. While millions struggle to find work, it seems that those of us with jobs are not taking them seriously enough. A summer intern—working for free and with nothing better to do—made… Continue reading

Until Unemployment Shrinks Obama Vows to Smoke Pack a Day

WASHINGTON D.C. Despite the government’s planned roll-out of nastier-than-ever cigarette labels later this week, President Barack Obama vowed today to smoke a pack a day until unemployment shrinks to normal levels. “Republicans appear to… Continue reading

Man Sues TiVo For Ruining His Life

BUTTE, MT. Tim Jervis is hopping mad at his TiVo. He claims it falsley accuses him of being gay. “Not that there’s anything wrong with that,” he says, “but, I could just scratch… Continue reading

Local Man Racks Up Massive Credit Debt During Out of Body Experience

MADISON, WI. “I can’t believe this is happening to me,” says Jake “Woody” Speers.  “I’m ruined.  This is like a bad joke.”  But the credit card companies don’t see it that way. He—or… Continue reading

Career Profiles: Motivational Speaker Admits He Just Cannot Get Motivated

NASHUA, NH. It has been a tough few months for Tom Krasny, motivational speaker. He just cannot get motivated. “You know who said that? Yoda. A fucking puppet in a fucking movie.” “I… Continue reading