Monthly Archive: April, 2013

George W. Bush “Presidential Liberry” Opens

“All Texans should feel welcome here, so no books” –W DALLAS (SWP): 43rd President George W. Bush voiced approval for his new library and museum on the SMU campus at a ribbon cutting… Continue reading

Kim Jong Un Calls out Obama in Video

Supreme Leader Inspired by West Side Story PYONGYANG (SWP): North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un surprised experts again today by releasing a video on his country’s news programming in which he seems to… Continue reading

Bartenders Whip Up “Plan B” Margaritas Nationwide

Plan B is the New Plan A BROOKLYN NY (SWP): From small West Virginia moonshine shacks to trendy urban watering holes, Plan B is the new plan A. According to Bartender’s Illustrated magazine… Continue reading

Hot Fired Rice

What’s That Clicking Sound? U.S. Coaches Hit Delete Buttons on Practice Tapes SAN CLEMENTE CA (SWP): Butch Chinitup, head basketball coach at Richard M. Nixon High School, invokes the school’s namesake when he… Continue reading

Scientists Search for Dark Matter with Cosmic Colonoscopy

Initiative Promises to “Look up the Ass of the Universe” GENEVA (SWP): Scientists around the world today began receiving findings from a bold new initiative to “look up the ass of the universe”… Continue reading