States Under Siege: New Jersey Selling Out The Boss

TRENTON, NJ. Governer Chris Christie, ever the trendsetter–think political fashion statements–has some tricks up his sleeve.  As states across the country struggle with record deficits that are threatening to cause a “double-dip” recession,… Continue reading

Community Held Hostage in Supermarket

NEWBURY PARK, CA.  “Ahhhh! Friggin’ A!  Now the old bat is going to pay by check!” exclaims one of the hostages. This worried and frustrated group of grocery shoppers isn’t afraid to call… Continue reading

Distraught Skeptic Pays Psychic to Find Beloved “Pet”

CHICAGO, IL. The pictures went up on fence posts for miles around. “Geez I missed that little gal,” says Big Mike “Little Mikey” O’Brien, “the way she ran around the rooms everyday in seemingly… Continue reading

A Dark Secret at the Office

CALABASAS, CA.  It sounds like the typical, early morning, office conversation at the typical office in America.  “Hey, Ken,” greets one worker, “How was your weekend?” “Uh, great … is this a fresh… Continue reading

CDC Warns of Spread of Resistant Virus

ATLANTA GA. “We are witnessing a gathering epidemic among white men with a cluster of predispositions,” says Dr. Andrew Loomis, chief researcher at the Center for Disease Control’s (CDC) Infectious Social Trends Division.… Continue reading

Vatican: Pope Also Takes Off Pants One Leg at a Time

VATICAN CITY.  After weeks of pressure and following the admission that His Holiness puts on his pants one leg at a time, the Vatican today has released a statement admitting that the Pope also removes them… Continue reading

Veteran Palin Watcher: She’s Not Running

MADISON, WI. “The helmet is the message”, blogged media watcher and Associate Professor of Media Studies, Osgood Cluman, on Tuesday in response to a much publicized photo of Sara Palin’s noggin safely ensconced… Continue reading

Big Oil Looks to Get Even Bigger

TEXAS CITY, TX.  Flush with cash and emboldened by the lack of outrage over recent gas prices, the oil industry is looking to expand their coffers even further. “Our recent price collusion test–at… Continue reading

Our America: In Grayson County, Virginia, They Are Hoping Crime Pays

Governors from 34 states responded sympathetically to a recent Washington Post story which chronicled the disappointment of Grayson County, Virginia residents to a promised economic boon based on the theory that crime pays… Continue reading

Chart of the Week: Should Palin Run for President?

WASHINGTON.  Black Leather.  Dark shades.  Combat  half-helmet.  Riding crop. Okay, maybe this reporter imagined that last one.  But this reporter’s brain is filled with many images. No, not those.  Think “Mission Accomplished.”  Think… Continue reading