Union of Banana Republics Votes to Approve U.S. Membership

In light of the recent election of world renowned entertainer, failed businessman, conspiracy theorist, and all around clown, Donald J. Trump … TEGUCIGALPA, HONDURAS (SWP): By a near unanimous margin, with one dissent,… Continue reading

The U.S. just elected a self-confirmed sexual predator with a porn model wife to the presidency. What say you?

  Great. ‘Cause high school and college age males needed a role model to help them with entitlement over sexual assault.” Sheila Patron, Thread Spooling Major Albuquerque, New Mexico “My daughters  have Secret… Continue reading

Comey Announces Additional Possible New Evidence in “Unrelated Alternative Reality”

WASHINGTON D.C. (SWP):  In a second announcement in as many days, FBI  Director, James B. Comey, alerted Congress that a third cache of possible evidence in the investigations against Hillary Clinton has been… Continue reading

Twitter Announced that It’s Cutting the Vine

The social media world is mourning the loss of Vine. Will you miss it? “I look forward to watching all the 10-minute long tribute videos honoring the six-second video.” Sheila Patron, Jalapeno Taster… Continue reading

Trump Campaign: Elevators and 35,000 Feet Not Subject to U.S. Laws

MELBOURNE, FL (SWP): Donald Trump claims that closed elevators are not subject to U.S. Laws. “It’s like being trapped in a box. And that box could be anywhere.” Likewise, said the campaign, flying… Continue reading

The People Speak: Target’s Single-Stall Bathrooms

“I meet so many nice people
in public restrooms.
I’d hate to see that go away.”

BREAKING: Trump Run Actually New Reality Show: The Candidate

We thought it would be interesting to turn the tables and make the boss the contestant MIRA LAGO, FL (SWP): A former employee of Bravo TV leaked the story to SWP. “It’s all… Continue reading

Trump: Obama and Clinton Traveled Through Time and Caused Great Depression of the 1930s

I have many friends, good friends, who told me. Many people are talking about it. I mean look, we’re talking about it right now. All of us. Thousands of people. In a room. It must be true.

Man Baby Trump Would Hit DNC Speakers If It Weren’t for Those Darned Bone Spurs

“I really regret that the military kept me from serving in Vietnam. You know, we would have won with me in there.”

Physiologist Proves Trump Does Indeed Have Small Hands

Confirms all the implications, if you know what we mean.