Tag Archive: Mitt Romney

Trump Tweets Picture of Trump Handwriting His Proscription List

NY, NY (SWP): The tweet came on a day when the Psychopath-elect mostly struck a positive tone on the eve of his inauguration. The announcement was accompanied by an image of Trump making… Continue reading

Willard Mitt Romney Said To Be Despondent After Loss

Even Mitt’s favorite game of  “Pin the $100 Bill on the Laid Off Worker” hasn’t brought him out of his funk BOSTON, MA (SWP): Mitt Romney is sad. His family thought familiar tasks… Continue reading

Obama to Divided, Tired Nation: “Chillax, I got this”

CHICAGO IL. (SWP): An astonishingly relaxed and confident Barak Obama addressed supporters at his victory party late Tuesday night, insisting that his second term would “blow everybody’s minds.” “Look,” says Obama, “I have… Continue reading

Romney Rushed to Hospital with Suspected Hernia

Relief Event Results in No Relief for Candidate KETTERING OH (SWP): Mitt Romney was rushed to a local hospital yesterday after injuring himself lifting a case of drinking water during a staged photo… Continue reading

Big Bird’s Ruffled Feathers

“Hey Romney, check your windshield” HOLLYWOOD, CA (SWP): The PBS star responded strongly to Romney’s vow during the presidential debate to cut funding to public television at an impromptu press conference from his… Continue reading

Romney: Am I Better Off Than Four Years Ago? Hell Yes!

“You Know, Come To Think Of It, I Am a Helluva Lot Better Off Than I Was Four Years Ago.” —Mitt Romney CORNPONE IA: (SWP on the Campaign Trail): Romney supporters laughed nervously… Continue reading

North Korean “Manchurian Baby” Attacks President

WASHINGTON D.C. (SWP): Grainy surveillance footage from Oval Office security cameras captured the shocking footage of a highly skilled infant assassin brandishing a razor sharp ninja binky giving chase to the president early… Continue reading

ROM COM Lands In Poland

WARSAW (SWP): Mitt Romney’s European Tour continues today with a stopover in Poland. Romney greeted government dignitaries with a brief speech on the airport tarmac, “Pozdrowienia, dlaczego nie można blow na moje gorące kiełbasa… Continue reading

The People Speak: Mitt Romney in the London Press

Presumptive Republican nominee Mitt Romney got a dose of British wit from London media and politicians this week. Should American voters care? “To quote myself in my 2010 book that I wrote myself,… Continue reading

The People Speak: Mitt Romney’s “Positive” Campaign

In response to attacks from the Obama campaign, Mitt Romney claims he (Mitt) is running a positive campaign. We ask: Is Mitt Romney Running a Positive Campaign?