Tag Archive: Newt Gingrich

BREAKING: Mitt Romney to Endorse Rick Santorum

“Three out of four people …. said the news is making them re-think their choice” CHICAGO, Il (SWP): To prove his credentials as the Severe Conservative and to move further to right than his… Continue reading

Gingrich Blasts Obama on Daylight Savings Time

JACKSON, MS (SWP):  On the Campaign Trail: Candidate Newt Gingrich today urged Americans to ignore announcements to “Spring Forward” by changing clocks at 2am Sunday morning. Mr. Gingrich claims that Daylight Savings Time… Continue reading

GOP Candidates Agree Obama to Blame for Solar Flares

JACKSON, MS (SWP): In a rare show  of unity, all the remaining GOP candidates agree—albeit for different reasons—that the blame for the recent solar flare event falls squarely on Barack Obama. “God is angry, my… Continue reading

Mitt Romney: Proving the American Dream Everyday

CARSON CITY, NV (SWP): This is one campaign stop of many on a nearly decade quest of Mitt Romney. Against all odds, this brave American is proving every day that the American Dream… Continue reading

Eye of Newt: Can You Handle the Sooth?

WASHINGTON D.C. (SWP): The Republican presidential candidate, in a press conference at the National Cathedral today, took credit for the .5% decline in the unemployment rate, stating, “Last week I told Wall Street Occupiers… Continue reading

The Donald Weighs in on The Election

NEW YORK, NY. The usually soft-spoken Donald Trump (@realDonaldTrump) has uncharacteristically weighed in on the 2012 presidential race. In a Small Winged Potatoes exclusive, we bring you the candid comments from his royal… Continue reading

Is This Thing On? Romney Pre-Debate Comments Captured on Bootleg Video

“… They’re both old, and gross, but that dude is extra creepy” AMES IA. High School Senior Jacob Saltzman, on a field trip with his Social Studies class, may have captured the story… Continue reading

Woman Can’t Place Voice-Over Actor; Kicks Cat Repeatedly

GILMAN, IA. A woman watching the OWN network last night allegedly kicked her cat repeatedly in frustration after she could not recall the name of the voice over actor on a TV commercial. “Damn… Continue reading

SWP Exclusive: Newt Gingrich’s Debate Notes

MANCHESTER, NH. Last night’s GOP candidate debate had few surprises.  Mitt Romney’s chin looked solid.  Michelle Bachmann announced she’s not just there for our viewing pleasure–she’s running.  Even Newt Gingrich started strong before… Continue reading

Gingrich: This is What’s in My Pants

“I’ve exchanged my Blackberry … for the love of God, someone help me.” WASHINGTON D.C. Sources in the Gingrich campaign confirmed today that the exodus of campaign staff was prompted by several photos sent… Continue reading