Pilots : We Often Use Bare Feet To Fly Plane

I once landed a plane with nothing but my scrotum. ATLANTA, GA (SWP): In a week when passenger shaming hit a new peak, pilots admit that they too like to “go casual.” After… Continue reading →

Trump: I’d Have Been a Beloved Slave Owner

“This proves that the President is not a racist,” Conway declared. “He was a beloved slave owner.”

Democrats Announce Brackets for “August Angst” Primary Tournament

WASHINGTON, D.C. (SWP): On the heels of two wild and unwieldy debates, and with still such an insanely large field, the DNC faces an ongoing crisis. Taking a page from college basketball and… Continue reading →

Trump Admits Surprised U.S. Still Standing

“I thought we’d be out of business by now”

Biden, Sanders Kill in Swimsuit Competition

Harris Surprises in Talent.

Joe Biden Tests New Gaffes

WASHINGTON D.C. (SWP): Last week saw the Biden campaign crisscrossing early battleground states and testing the appeal of gaffes that the former Vice-President and his team have been developing. “We’re testing some new… Continue reading →

Trump Considering Tariffs on U.S. Exports

Tariffs are doing so tremondously, tremendous, on other countries. Ours will be even bigger and better. WASHINGTON D.C. (SWP): Donald Trump, touting the success of his tariff threat against Mexico, and what he… Continue reading →

Meal Kit Services Under Constant Threat Millennials Discover Grocery Stores

“These services are predicated on the fact that their customers don’t know how easy it is to buy ingredients at the local market.”

Local Man Blows First Date Before Main Course by Signalling Support for Trump

“I got excited,” said the young man, Jason Edward Aultman, shaking his head. “It just came out.”

Trump-Putin Call Transcripts Leaked

“You said, Tatars. Tee-hee.”